Thursday, August 8, 2013

A Haunting at Silver Falls

This 2013 (remarkably recent) film possesses a fine example of my favorite pet peeve - the failed beefgeek. Seriously, putting an over-tanned beefcake in pathetically large and decades out-of-date glasses does not make him capable of performing geekery. If you want us to believe your character scored over 2400 on the SATs, hire an actor capable of pronouncing technobabble, and then GIVE HIM TECHNOBABBLE. (I mean, provided you can write it. If you can't write it - just stick to what you know. Write average characters). Really. Technobabble is SEXY. Why do you think we all go nuts for Benedict Cumberbatch? It isn't his cartoony lips, I swear. It's what comes out of them.

Although: points for making your character look incapable of slapping somebody hard enough to make a sound.

Sorry to start a review on a low-note. As a thriller and a mystery, this film passed! It was at least average, if not slightly above on the "smart protagonist" score (that chick was written strong!) especially for her repeatedly and sincerely turning down the drug-dealing, predatory douche-nozzle (although that unfortunately left her in the clutches of the film's mysterious perpetrator). Unfortunately, her preference for a really bad actor didn't win the audience's sympathy, and watching him as a finishing minion, I felt "meh."

Oh - and I think a couple of times the filter was a little too strong. I don't think woods are supposed to be black and white. Although colors are more difficult for the eye to distinguish in the dark, it's not impossible for most people.