An Accidental Husband

 I found another one. Uptight radio pseudo-psychologist Emma (Uma Thurman) is engaged to Richard (Colin Firth) but angry Patrick (Jeffrey Dean Morgan of Supernatural) sabotages the engagement by having his hacker friend convince the State of New York that she is married to Patrick already. Commence paper-signing fiasco a la Sweet Home Alabama.

Typically of the genre, she can't relax enough to say anything nice until she gets drunk. Actually, if you follow the scene more closely (and try not to think of all the cliches), Patrick won't let her get a word in edgewise, feeding her shot after shot, while she tries frantically to explain the situation kindly, and in a pathetically vulnerable voice. Although it would still convince any post-apocalyptic alien sociologist that human females aren't attractive until intoxicated, it isn't quite as obvious as some other examples of the same scene.

Unlike the typical bitchy-businesswoman rom com, Emma is actually a pretty nice person, if a little bitter (think Ashley Judd from Someone Like You). As the film continues, the audience learns it's all her father's fault, but he's turning out okay, too. All-in-all, this film is pretty forgiving. No one character comes off as all bad, or two-dimensionally evil, although most of the characters have an unattractive moment or two. Even Colin Firth doesn't go gently into the night, going so far as to threatening legal action against Patrick's hacker friend. The flick skirts the "guy deceives girl" cliche by the skin of its teeth, though, which in some circles is the unforgivable sin.

All of these rom coms stem from one specific place, and I think I know which. Romance novels from specific publishers must meet a specific set of criteria, and many of these criteria cover the main character's occupation and personality. Confident young women whose aspect of confidence (bitchiness, being controlling, perfectionism, bitterness) hides vulnerability, and who work at a middle-income occupation (not too butch, not too aristocratic) find themselves softened by the unswerving, if badly managed, attentions of a manly man whose occupation is competitive, if not actually superior. I'm going to start compiling a list, I think.

These novels are all a complete waste of time (every single last one. No exceptions), but I don't necessarily feel the same way of all of such films. Admittedly, if you've seen one, you've seen most of the others, but there must be wider variations, and some that have some semblance of depth. Some of them must contain interesting characters with psychological pleasantness. I guess I'll see. I like lists.